The Alien Itinerary

Advertisement in an interplanetary travel brochure: Planet in distant galaxy (third from a sun) has must see terrestrial struggles! All the mayhem you can handle! Don’t delay! Book now!

Hmmm….a travel ad for extra-terrestrials, I guess that’s a bit too farcical but the “all the mayhem you can handle” is certainly true; just not its inclusion on an alien travel directory.

But it may help to explain why our mysterious extra-terrestrial….ummm….friends will probably never show themselves any time soon.

So I’ve decided to put pen to paper…er…fingers to keyboard and see what I can conjure for why they visit our little rock in the cosmos.

Ahead warp factor ten….engage!

If they are spying on our earthly affairs perhaps they’re recording our history for their own posterity. Think of the spectacle they must be witnessing while all the while providing lessons in how not to evolve.

There could be a more sinister element to their hiding and watching; possibly along the lines of (gulp) control: we could be fantastical marionettes in a diabolical thriller designed for their amusement.

This scary picture is definitely an Alfred Hitchcockian plot line but could easily explain the struggles our species has been suffering for what seems like forever. It isn’t that difficult to imagine especially if you’ve read or saw some of the bizarre storylines Mr. Hitchcock was famous for filming.

But of course that’s outlandish.

It’s far more likely they’re here to observe us grappling with the many avatars that have been and probably will be part of our destiny. You could doubtless add to that the likelihood of them witnessing other planets in varying degrees of development which would afford them the opportunities to draw comparisons in ways that are implausible to our current intellectual abilities.

For me what’s really curious is their silence, other than being observed in what amounts to fleeting moments they refuse to say hello.

Of course their incommunicado is understandable if you put yourself in their place as they identify the many absurdities of the human species.

What with the almost constant state of pandemonium that envelopes our little jewel in the universe you’d have to consider they’ve got us figured out from an evolutionary standpoint and as such know that contact now would almost certainly unleash the same crap going on down here on the many worlds they probably visit on a regular basis.

So folks:

Sadly for us but happily for those other biospheres floating out there in space:

Kudos to them.